120 Babies

I have to listen to music, loudly, in my own office, to drown out the sounds of the dude next door. His voice irritates me.

Maybe it is because I have my period.

Naw, it’s because he has an irritating voice.

I was going to write about the gym today. Well, I will briefly rant about one thing that I see a lot.

There was a neighbourhood guy on the Smith machine today, doing squats. He was doing them all wrong, to boot. He was using his hips as a lever, going far too fast. Form was really bad. And I’m all about good form.

I guess he thought he was doing them really well though because he amped up the weight to 100 + the bar. Not a bad weight except it was obvious he couldn’t manage it. He was struggling, moving too fast, knees way over his toes. When he finished his set, he flipped the bar so that it would catch except that it didn’t catch because the bar was too heavy for his wrists.

What did he do?

Swore like a sailor and blamed the machine. He even tried to get sympathy from the other gym rats around him, citing how his Smith machine was faulty. No one listened. I just went back to doing my squats in the cage and thought to myself, “Dude, you fucked up. We all do it. Move on or get a trainer to teach you to use the machines correctly.”

I’m done the first round of Amanda exercise and am now looking forward to a week of active rest before round two comes up.  I am thinking of doing a couple things — HiiTs training, tabata, maybe a run and even Amanda’s short workout. I will find something to do other than chin ups considering that I can’t do them. Yet. :-)

If you asked me what “grosses me out”, without hesitation I would say eggshells, hard-boiled eggs, egg salad sandwiches. I have a real aversion to those ovals. And today didn’t help.

I got up for breakfast and decided to poach a couple eggs for myself. Things went kaflooey and the water boiled while the eggs were in the hot water which meant the yokes were cooked early. Being ignorant about eggs outside of the scrambled or omelette realm, I decided to pull them out and eat them.

It was one of the foulest experiences of my life. The egg white was undercooked and even as I write this I am squirming. I’ve been working all morning at getting that texture and flavour memory outta my head.

It’s just insult to injury, you know. The smell of egg salad and hard-boiled eggs makes me queasy. Eggshells just freak me out. I don’t really understand why — it’s that thin crunchiness I suppose. And, have you ever accidentally chewed a piece of shell? Again, I’m about to barf even considering it.

Damn you eggs. Why are you such great protein and so difficult for me? I have no hesitation in harvesting you little fuckers from chickens — in fact, I wish I could have my own coop. But you are also complex and disgusting when done wrong. And that happens way too much.

I can get into all the emotional reasons why I never let myself be thin at another time. In fact, I will.  I can say that somehow I finally had a switch click inside me — all the drinking, all the hiding, all the excuses had to go. It is time for me to claim my body for myself. And I began that journey in January 2010.

The timing has nothing to do with New Years resolutions, if I may be so bold. It was just that after drinking far too much over Christmas and gaining so much weight, I realized that my lifestyle is not healthy. And, more than anything, being 40 and looking forward into the next decade, I’ve got to be healthy.

I changed my diet. I started to eat along the G.I. Diet guidelines by Rick Gallup. It is sensible and I can eat most things. There is no way that I feel like I am wanting. I don’t eat sugar, don’t drink alcohol, only eat complex carbs, limit the number of bread etc. Basically, I’m all about protein, veggies and fruit.  That started in early January along with waking up at 5:00 a.m. and heading to the YMCA to work out.

I knew that I needed to change my habits. Switch up the negative habits for positive ones. Really, most of January was about enabling that change.

Next, I started working out with a woman named Amanda who is so fit, so inspirational… well, it’s made a big difference. My workouts went from 45-60 minutes of routine and boredom to 40 minutes of fun and challenges. I do things like HiiTS and tabata. Started doing proper pushups… I realized that I am strong and capable of making change.

When we began this program about one month ago, we took a series of measurements instead of weighing me. Why? Well, I’m a recovered bulimic and I know my triggers. Weight is a major one. Somehow, measurements don’t have the same effect. So, in one month, (and this is huge) I have lost 1 1/2” from my waist, 2” from my bust, 2” from my belly, 2” from my shoulder span and 1” from my neck.

I didn’t know I could lose weight from my neck!

I’m feeling really good about all this and what’s more to come.